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WHY WORK WITH ME?

 

I'm friendly and I care. I know it can be nerve-wracking seeking out this type of therapy so I aim to put my clients at ease quickly. I've successfully worked with individuals and couples of all ages, backgrounds, sexualities and neurodiversities.   ​

 

I'm practical and goal-orientated. A lot of what we do is investigative: digging into what's happening and why. I might suggest tests, exercises or interventions, or help you uncover any psychological reasons contributing to the issue, "joining the dots" as one client used to say. Maybe there's nothing to "fix", so it's about working on understanding, self-acceptance, peace. 
​​​

​​I get it. I'm neurodiverse and non-monogamous myself, both of which I've only acknowledged late in life after trying to squeeze myself into boxes that didn't fit. It's why I'm here now. ​​​​​​​​

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SAMANTHA
FALCONER
PSYCHOSEXUAL AND RELATIONSHIP THERAPIST,
CLINICAL SEXOLOGIST
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Walthamstow E17
Buckhurst Hill IG9
Online
Services

SPECIALISMS

I have training and experience with a number of issues related to sex, intimacy and identity. If you don't see what you need, please ask, and if I can't help I may well know someone who can. 

FOR COUPLES

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Affairs, Mismatched Desire, Communication Issues, Support Through Separation 

I offer Gottman and Imago informed therapy when communication or intimacy may have broken down. I can faciliate work towards reconciliation after affairs. Or I can mediate some tougher conversations. I may also suggest seeing both of you individually.

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Polyamory, Ethical Non-Monogamy, Open Relationships, Swinging

Whether you're considering opening your relationship or already have, or are living as poly or ENM, we can work through the pleasures, pains and pitfalls, with, above all, mutual agreement, establishment of boundaries, and consent.

FOR INDIVIDUALS

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Painful Sex, Vaginismus, Vulvodynia, Lichen Sclerosus, Genito Pelvic Pain Disorder

Whether or not you have a diagnosis yet, I'll help you figure out what's going on, guide you to get to  know your body better, but, most importantly, be there for you to be vulnerable and heard.

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Low or Changed Libido, Mismatched Desire and Orgasm Issues

Together we can work on what makes you tick, help discover or rediscover your suppressed or lost sexuality, or validate your low libido or asexuality. There is no pressure here to be anything you're not.

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Kinks and Fetishes

Perhaps you're in distress, feeling confusion, shame, or fear of discovery, or want to tell a partner. We can dig into what's going on in a judgement-free space, and move towards self-knowledge, shame reduction and inner peace. 

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Menopause: Physical and Emotional Changes

With huge hormonal changes creating a plethora of symptoms, we can feel as if we don't recognise our body, sexuality or mind any more. I'm here to to talk through your emotions and practical options. I've been through it myself so know just how hard it can be.

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Erectile Disorder, Premature or Delayed Ejaculation, Performance Anxiety 

Whether your issue is physical, psychological, a mix of both, or you don't even know yet, I'll try and help you work out what your body is doing and why, calmly, caringly and curiously. You're safe with me.

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Compulsive Sexual Behaviours, Problematic Porn Usage (Addiction), Hypersexuality

If you think you have a problem here, we can work out if so and why, and towards a place of less distress and shame, and help you curb any problematic behaviour or practises, if necessary.

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Rediscovering Sexuality After Trauma or Illness

Trauma from an event or experience, an abusive relationship, sexual assault, or a life-changing illness, can affect identity, sexuality, drive, relationships and our relationships with our body, but there can be a way back. 

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Identity Around Sexuality, Asexuality or Gender

Maybe you're trying to work out who you are, or who you're attracted to, or not. It would be understandable if you were feeling scared in the current climate. We can explore and validate the authentic you in a safe space. I am anti-conversion therapy of any kind. 

PRICES

PER SESSION

From:

£75 for individuals

£110 for couples​

Payable in advance​​

BLOCK OF SIX

From:

£420 for individuals

£625 for couples​​​

20% payable in advance

of first session

LOW COST THERAPY

I have limited online slots for concessions starting from £40

Do please ask

ABOUT

SAMANTHA FALCONER

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ABOUT ME

After many years working in the media, I set out to become a sex therapist after being unable to find a therapist experienced with “non-normative” relationships. It felt there was little room to explore the possibility that maybe some people - like me - just aren't monogamous, but by nature or nurture is the interesting question. 

I trained at The Contemporary Institute of Clinical Sexology (CICS), the UK's most prestigious psychosexual training school and am registered with College of Sex and Relationship Therapists (COSRT) and abide by their code of ethics and standards. 

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I take a great interest in shame. So much of the work I do is rooted in shame, I witness the damage done by its use as a weapon of social control, slut shaming for example or suffocating masculine scripts. ​​​​​​​

APPROACH

I am trained in - and passionate about - the pluralistic (aka integrative) approach: psychodynamic, person-centred and cognitive behavioural therapy.

 

What that means for my clients is we work in whichever way is best suited to your personality and presentation. This method works  particularly well for neurodiverse clients. I've worked with many with autism or ADHD (dianosed and self diagnosed) where therapy has been difficult previously. 

I favour the Gottman approach when working with couples, because it is rooted in years of research on the key elements that make for successful relationships. 

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ACTIVE INCLUSIVITY

I work hard to provide a safe and informed space for Global Majority, LGBTQIA+, sex worker clients,  and anyone with non-normative relationship styles.

 

GSRD Therapy ("gender, sex and relationship diversity") was coined by Pink Therapy to highlight the needs of clients to have a therapist who is committed to social justice, is trauma informed and culturally competent but with humility. You are welcome to ask me whatever you need to know to feel reassured.

CERTIFICATIONS
  • Diploma in Psychosexual and Relationship Therapy from The Contemporary Institute of Clinical Sexology (CICS)
  • College of Sex and Relationship Therapists (COSRT) registered  
  • Levels 2 & 3 Counselling Skills. Awarding body CPCAB.
  • Trauma informed
  • ADHD and autism informed
  • Advanced DBS; insured with Holistic Insurance

WHY "ROOKERY" THERAPY

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I love watching rooks build their rookeries. They are haphazard, precarious and chaotic, a raucous locus of mating and breeding. But also an emblem of determination against a sometimes unfriendly world, and a place of gathering, safety and nurture. ​​

 

At Rookery Therapy you'll find support amid the chaos.   

CONTACT
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GET IN TOUCH

  • Contact me confidentially.

  • You can book a free 20 min chat by phone, Zoom or text or...

  • Book an initial assessment appointment or block.

  • There will be some paperwork to complete in due course for confidentiality and safety.  

LOCATIONS

Please give a brief description of your needs, concerns or goals; and whether you're looking for online, or in person in Buckhurst Hill or Walthamstow.

Please note, this is not an emergency service. If you are in crisis and need immediate help, you should contact The Samaritans, call 999 or 111, or visit your local A&E. 

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